


Overcoming the difficulties

by RaspberryDevil



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Depression, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-08
Updated: 2015-08-17
Packaged: 2018-03-11 03:44:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3312647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaspberryDevil/pseuds/RaspberryDevil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"But he knows Oikawa, knows that he has enough fangirls to fool around with, knows that he could have more than one girlfriend and knows better than anyone else that his feeling would never be mutual. Maybe that is the reason why he is moping [...]" It's the beginning of their second year, a Saturday spending at the gym for  a session of extra training which turns out to be pretty good - at least after the team stops moping around.</p><p>[Depression warning for the second chapter only.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Visit

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first HQ story I posted on my tumblr back on October & so I thought it also should be my first post on AO3.  
> I really like this ship though it's not my main Oikawa ship, I guess, but I really like it nevertheless. This is happy stuff, the angst comes with a second chapter

“It's not really fair”, Kindaichi mumbles and Kunimi just nods absently. 

It's Saturday and they are preparing for a session of extra training, though now nobody is doing anything, sitting around in the gym and waiting for their coach who disappeared due to a phone call to come back. So the team uses his absence for a break, and while there is a lot to discuss, these are the first words Kindaichi says to his friend.   
But there is no other reply than the nod.  
With a sigh – Kindaichi is used to the lack of response, but somehow he kind of needs someone to complain to right now – he tosses the ball he held towards Kunimi who catches it with ease, and even though he caught on to his intention as well, he isn't interested in talking. Not that he has any idea what to say, after all he still isn’t entirely sure if it is really love or just a silly crush his friend has, but it doesn't matter since seeing Iwaizumi kiss another person hurt him nevertheless. A few others were moping about this issue as well and while Kunimi seems to do the same, he is more concerned about something else. 

“What's with this mood? Shouldn't you train?” 

The voice which brings them back to their feet, causing them to feel guilty for taking a break, is not the one of their coach.

“Oikawa-san?”

Kunimi's denies inwardly that his heart misses a beat when he sees him winking at them, a typical grin on the brunet's lips before his hands vanish in the pocket of his college jersey. 

“Long time no see.” 

The former captain makes his way from the door to the field and it's rather amusing to see all of them – even the new first years – standing up as if he was a prominent person. Suddenly, Kunimi appreciates the time with his sulking teammates more, wishes to just vanish because he can't look at him. It's not like he doesn't appreciate Oikawa either, far from it.  
He is madly and deeply in love with his former captain.   
But he knows Oikawa, knows that he has enough fangirls to fool around with, knows that he could have more than one girlfriend and knows better than anyone else that his feeling would never be mutual. Maybe that is the reason why he is moping, realising that the others would get over the crush easier than he would get over his feelings (it's not his first love, thankfully, otherwise it would hurt even more). 

“Are you here because Iwaizumi has a date and dumped you?”, someone asks, causing Oikawa to grimace. 

“How mean. Is this all you have to say to your beloved Setter?” 

A few roll their eyes, smiling upon seeing this typical behaviour, something they've missed without realising, a scene which only lacked Iwaizumi's scolding. 

Grabbing the ball in his hands a bit tighter, Kunimi knows that he regrets the words before he even speaks them. 

“Would you toss for us then?” 

He almost says “me”, glance still lowered so he doesn't see the short change in Oikawa's expression, the smile sliding from his lips for a mere second before it's perfectly in place again. 

“See, that's what you should ask. Of course I do.” 

The coach doesn't mind that Oikawa joins them, that he shows Yahaba how to improve his stance or tells the first years how to move, to use the field and position to their advantage. Everyone forgets what troubles them, solely focuses on their movements, the ball and how to keep it from falling to the ground.  
And after the intense training, Kunimi feels better. 

~*~

“Isn't Kindaichi with you?” 

Kunimi wonders how pathetic he actually is, head always snapping up as soon as he hears the voice, finger's unmoving on the key of his phone.

“He forgot something in the gym”, he tells him, trying to sound neutral (he wonders since when it was so difficult to sound bored, something which came to him normally otherwise, as far as he can tell from other people’s remarks)

“He can be pretty forgetful, right?”

The brunet smiles at him, starting a casual conversation and this is the moment when Kunimi can't take it anymore. He puts his phone away, feels still high enough from practise and he has nothing to risk anyway, hasn't he? Oikawa looks at him expectantly, waiting for a response, but Kunimi says nothing. Instead, he closes the distance and simply kisses him, a short touch of their lips, nothing more than the fulfilment of an urge. 

“Thank you for tossing today.”

He turns around, ignoring the dumbfounded expression on Oikawa's face, the heat rising to his cheeks and his own heart beating faster (he doesn't even think about Kindaichi, the upcoming complaining why he didn't wait for him; he just needs to get away).   
However he feels a hand closing around his wrist, stopping him from going by pulling him back against the broad chest, followed by an amused chuckle. 

“Honestly, Iwa-chan will get really mad.” 

He wonders for a moment what the other one has to do with this, before the brunet turns him around and they are suddenly so close, so close that he stops breathing for a split second, his mind more awake than he ever hopes to achieve in class.  
They are not very apart in high, still Oikawa needs to bend down to whisper the next words in his ear; his breath along his neck sends a pleasant shiver down his spine.

“After all he told me often enough not to hit on our first years.” 

He knows that he should protest, should tell him that he is a second year now, but the whole force of the words suddenly hit him; the realisation is overshadowed by a pair of lips against his own.  
It last longer than his short peck and he can't help himself, wrapping his arm around the older one's neck because this is what he wanted. For a long time now. And really, even though the older one might be messing around, he still wants to savour this moment (he pretends that he hadn't heard the chuckle coming from the other man). 

“We need to practise that”, he murmurs after they break the kiss, smiling, and Kunimi doesn't need anyone to tell him that it's genuine this time.

“Yes.”

“I see you then”, Oikawa tells him before he sets off, a last quick kiss pressed on his mouth which leaves a small smile behind.

And the smile on Kunimi's lips doesn't vanish, even when he walks home alongside Kindaichi who is oblivious of what happened in his absence.  
( Not even the “Please stop this constant smiling. It's unusual and freaks me out” lowers his mood)


	2. hurdle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kunimi was staying over when Oikawa's parents were out and while the brunet acted strange since the evening, it was fine, nothing to worry about until it took a turn for the worse; it seemed different form his usual insecure moods, and Kunimi can only assume that it's also the stress from university, breaking the last straw, little things he bottled up before he couldn't hold it in any longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I forgot about this and I'm really sorry, also because it's rather short again. Also adding depression to the warnings for this chapter, just to make sure, I don't know how it happened. I rewrote this chapter several times because it sounded like an unhealthy relationship and I'm still not sure, so if you think there might be a scene which is still not good portrayed, don't feel afraid to tell me, I'll do my best to correct it.   
> (I just wanted to finally finish this).

He was aware of the fact that Oikawa wasn't perfect, that it was Iwaizui who hold him together during middle school, helped him with his breakdowns – he was unmotivated but not blind.

Yet he had no idea how bad it actually was.

Kunimi was staying over when Oikawa's parents were out and while the brunet acted strange since the evening, it was fine, nothing to worry about until it took a turn for the worse; it seemed different form his usual insecure moods, and Kunimi can only assume that it's also the stress from university, breaking the last straw, little things he bottled up before he couldn't hold it in any longer.

And even when he couldn't take it any more, his outburst was not really an outburst in which he screamed and cried. Oikawa just told him to go home, no, that Kunimi can make more use of his time at home and not by his side, and the way he said it, gaze averted and making himself smaller, hit Kunimi harder than any actual punch could have; the brunet went to his room without waiting for an answer, pulling a blanket over his head and not moving.

Kunimi didn't know who to call at first, not knowing how to handle the situation by himself because there was no way he would leave him alone like that, until a name popped up.

Right.

Iwaizumi.

Kunimi didn't want to bother him but he was the most logical choice and he was also pretty confident that he'd never see Oikawa as a burden. Just like his friend he was home over the weekend and so Kunimi shook his hesitation off and reached out for his phone.

* * *

Hajime sighed when his phone rang, interrupting his short nap.

“Yes? Iwaizumi here”, he answered with a hoarse voice, before the person on the other end of the line spoke and he was wide awake again.

He knew that Oikawa would still be reckless, that him attending university wouldn't change this, however he considered him mature enough to tone it down, down enough so that he didn't have to get up and fetch him out of the gym after his teammates called.

But now he kind of wished that the call he received was one of those.

“He won't talk nor move”, Kunimi told him over the phone, the casual tone gone and a subtle hint of helplessness; Hajime suppressed the urge to sigh, pinched his nose before he took a deep breath.

“I'm on my way.”

~

Kunimi sat on the other side of the closed door, back pressed against it and knees drawn up while Hajime talked to Oikawa. At least he assumed they were talking. It didn't take him long to come over, not even five minutes, but the time they spend in the room was longer and to Kunimi it felt like hours. They didn't scream, didn't throw around anything and there was no hitting as far as he cold tell, just hushed voices which could belong to either of them.

He had no idea how long he sat there, only that it was enough for him to go into the kitchen and eat something short (Iwaizumi-san would scold him if he found out that he wasn't eating because he was worried and Oikawa would be angry at himself for causing him these worries).

When he sat down again, in the same position, merely a few minutes passed, nothing in comparison to the eternity before, until the door opened and Iwaizumi looked down at him – not on, a difference which told him so much about his character and more then once he asked himself why it hadn't been him he feel in love with, someone who could tell how Kageyama felt, who felt helpless in front of Ushijima as well but pushed it aside to help his best friend and someone who was just admirable; but he loved Oikawa and it was fine. More than fine even.

(Hajime went home before Kunimi could thank him).

At first Kunimi just stood in the door, having no idea what to do, before he approached the other one when he turned around to face him. He sneaked under the blanket, facing Oikawa with a few centimetre separating them. He realised that it had always been Oikawa who closed the distance between them, searching for closeness; why hadn't he realised this sooner?

“I'm sorry”, Oikawa mumbled.

And this surprised Kunimi. Where was the person who bragged with the cute little boyfriend he had? Gone. Where was the person with the smile and teasing? Absent. He seemed like a different person and yet he was the same, the person he fell in love with during their last year on the same team. And he still loved him.

“Why are you apologising?”

“You can go if you want to.”

He was ignoring his question, that much was obvious and the smile he sent him was filled with sadness, so that Akira just wanted to grab him, to shake him so long that he realised the stupidity of this statement.

Oikawa wouldn't do anything to hurt him, not willingly, but these words, his own missing confidence, Kunimi's realisation of his own missing strength to do what Hajime had done to cheer up his friend hit him harder than he'd like to admit.

“I won't leave. I love you”, Kunimi said, merely loud enough for the two of them to hear.

Tooru was throwing around with his confessions, speaking out loud the words Kunimi couldn't, that's why he went still when he heard him say that.

“And you put more effort in this relationship than I do, just as much as you put in anything else. You're gorgeous. An amazing person and thinking less of you is beyond my understanding. But it happens and I'm here, I'm not leaving.”

_Even though I'm not good enough_ , he wanted to add, _You should be the one who is sick of this_ , but it's not the right thing to say right now, would only make Oikawa feel guilty even though he had no need to be, never, after all it's not his fault – Oikawa had pressed him against his chest before he had the chance to say anything else.

“I'm sorry, I haven't realised that you think like that about me.”

“You have nothing to apologise for”, Kunimi mumbled against his shirt, struggled to break free, embarrassment tinting his cheeks red, but even when Oikawa allowed him some room to breath again, still an arm around his boyfriend, he didn't leave.

“I treat you to dinner tomorrow”, he murmured against his hair after a few minutes passed and Kunimis was sure that the blush on his cheeks was gone.

“What?”

It was not unusual that Oikawa changed topics like that, still, Kunimi didn't quiet get used to it and probably wouldn't so soon, at least not without irritation.

“We haven't been on an official date yet, right? And it's almost June.”

“You...”

Kunimi wants to say a lot, found himself rather talkative today, but no other word made it past his lips.

“Smile for me”, Oikawa said, kissed the corner of his mouth, “Please”, moving a hand to his neck, fingers brushing up trough his hair, “will you?”, before he placed his lips against the corner of his eyes, “just for me”, moving to his mouth, his kiss slightly possessive – Kunimi wonders why he asked, after all he was always smiling because of him, either way during a match or outside.

Suddenly he feels fingers creeping under his shirt, sending a shiver down his spine.

“Or do you want to moan for me?”

Kunimi bit his lips, keeping from answering – this was what he hoped for, being able to tell what he wanted, even if it meant that Oikawa was in control, but he feared that any word could ruin it.

“I can't wait.”

He exhaled a breath. Good. This was a person he could deal with. But what was he supposed to do if this happened again? He couldn't call Iwaizumi all the time when this happened.

“Stop thinking”, Oikawa murmured against his temple.

“I love you.”

“Two confessions in one day, maybe I should mope more often.”

“Please don't”, Kunimi choked, gripping his shirt tighter.

Reducing his feelings to mere moping was so like him, Kunimi realised, like his own feelings weren't valid enough in face of other one's and more than once he forget that Oikawa's action which showed he was in control were just to cover up how helpless he felt.

“I'm sorry”, Oikawa said, kissed his forehead.

“Don't make jokes like that. Please, don't keep your feelings from me.”

“I'll try, if you bear with me, I might be able to do this.”

“We can do this together, you know?”

“Yes. Come here.”

Oikawa pushed himself up, reckon Kunimi to sit between his legs. He did it without hesitation, arms wrapped around his neck but only to push his weight against him so that they lie down; the laugh which espaces Oikawa upon this action makes Kunimi feel better, a nice ring in his ear.

“It's pretty early. Do you really want to sleep?”

Normally he would, wouldn't hesitate to cuddle up against him, but even though Kunimi didn't want to in this moment, it seemed like they needed this right now, a bit of calm.

“Yes.”

And Oikawa just smiled, kissing his forehead before he decided that this was a good idea – it didn't take long before both fell asleep, their soft breathing filling the room, lost in dreamless sleep; when they wake up, a new day would start, not a restart since the past happenings were kept in their mind, should be, but another attempt at trying to show their emotions.

  
  



End file.
